Wow, it's been awhile since I posted anything. Sorry for the long delay but my days and nights got flipped upside down for much of the winter. I have experienced enough to fill many blogs but I want to give a synopsis of how God has been developing Connections. Even though I may need some thawing out from winter, He has been very busy. Here are the latest lessons God has taught me.
1. There is no room for solo performers
God trimmed much of my support away in December. I was suddenly on the opposite schedule from Deniz, the kids, church and friends. Many of the men who God raised from the homeless community as support were unable to work with me. God allowed me to attempt to carry most of the burden of the CNS on my own for a 11 day stretch. My knees nearly buckled, my compassion was drained, and I began avoiding the very people God has called me to serve.
I experienced this trial so Connections can avoid the same mistake. When budgets are tight and manpower strained it is tempting to shoulder the burden yourself or place it on a willing staff member. Burnout and compassion fatigue are very real dangers in ministry and social work alike. To serve God we must find balance between our mission and our well being.
After the 11 night run I was given the opportunity to schedule support staff for the CNS, Destiny (part of our Connection team) stepped up to cover some of my shifts, and I was able to find a better balance. I walked away with an appreciation of the Body of Christ (individuals working in concert) and the need to define our mission.
2. The land of Compassion and love is not without boundaries
I have developed a relationship with many in the homeless community. Through these relationships God was able to minister and care for the guest of the CNS. Humbly serving individuals with dignity and respect has given me a voice into many lives. However, boundaries are needed.
In mid-January the CNS experienced its first fight. A group of twenty had gathered outside to smoke. An argument erupted along racial lines and when I arrived on scene there were rumors the first punch had already been thrown. My attempts to calm the situation peacefully failed and tension were still escalating, I lost my temper. Shouting at the top of my lungs I ordered everyone inside. Fortunately, everyone listened and it appeared peace had been restored. However, twenty minutes I was called outside by one of the guests; two men were fighting in the parking lot. When I arrived everyone denied any involvement, but it appeared two of the main actors in the early incident had decided it wasn't over. I spoke calmly and rationally to both, explained the consequences, and begged them to give each other a wide birth the rest of the night. As the two men, in a group of 15 others, moved inside I was pleased calmer heads had prevailed (until I got nearly inside). Without warning a brawl between the two men exploded inside the CNS. Several guest and a volunteer rushed in to pull them apart while I dialed 911. When TPD arrived both men acted remorseful. I did not want either sent to jail, but one had an outstanding warrant. The CNS quieted quickly and peace was finally restored.
I was ashamed I lost my temper that evening. I felt as though I had failed my mission. Charged with caring for people experiencing homelessness; instead going on a full blown tirade. I now realize I had been too lax in defining boundaries which caused the need for such an extreme. Compassion and love are often misperceived as weakness. God is a God of discipline and order. Defining boundaries for those we serve is an act of love and demonstrates we care. Once again I learned balance. This time a balance between lawlessness and draconian restrictions. Without boundaries people press outward to find them. When rules are used to manage people like cattle the spirit is crushed.
3. The Power of Restoration
The CNS afforded me the opportunity for the first time to live among the people I serve. From December through February I spent more time with them than my own family (yes I know, out of balance). I was humbled by their reaction to our simple efforts: a narrow cot less than 3 feet from the neighboring cots, a large shower room with no privacy, and day-old pastries. Tensions and strains I had observed for years began melting away and confidence began to emerge. God's presence was felt and restoration began. Connections moved from theory to reality. The homeless community is ripe for harvest. Efforts which would have little effect on those living in affluence have great impact on those living in the desert. It is time to move!
11 Two in a bed warm each other.
Alone, you shiver all night.
12 By yourself you're unprotected.
With a friend you can face the worst.
Can you round up a third?
A three-stranded rope isn't easily snapped. (Ecclesiastes 4:11-12, The Message)
11 My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD,
Nor detest His correction;
12 For whom the LORD loves He corrects,
Just as a father the son in whom he delights.
(Proverbs 3:11-12, New King James Version)
28 Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28, New King James Version)
1. There is no room for solo performers
God trimmed much of my support away in December. I was suddenly on the opposite schedule from Deniz, the kids, church and friends. Many of the men who God raised from the homeless community as support were unable to work with me. God allowed me to attempt to carry most of the burden of the CNS on my own for a 11 day stretch. My knees nearly buckled, my compassion was drained, and I began avoiding the very people God has called me to serve.
I experienced this trial so Connections can avoid the same mistake. When budgets are tight and manpower strained it is tempting to shoulder the burden yourself or place it on a willing staff member. Burnout and compassion fatigue are very real dangers in ministry and social work alike. To serve God we must find balance between our mission and our well being.
After the 11 night run I was given the opportunity to schedule support staff for the CNS, Destiny (part of our Connection team) stepped up to cover some of my shifts, and I was able to find a better balance. I walked away with an appreciation of the Body of Christ (individuals working in concert) and the need to define our mission.
2. The land of Compassion and love is not without boundaries
I have developed a relationship with many in the homeless community. Through these relationships God was able to minister and care for the guest of the CNS. Humbly serving individuals with dignity and respect has given me a voice into many lives. However, boundaries are needed.
In mid-January the CNS experienced its first fight. A group of twenty had gathered outside to smoke. An argument erupted along racial lines and when I arrived on scene there were rumors the first punch had already been thrown. My attempts to calm the situation peacefully failed and tension were still escalating, I lost my temper. Shouting at the top of my lungs I ordered everyone inside. Fortunately, everyone listened and it appeared peace had been restored. However, twenty minutes I was called outside by one of the guests; two men were fighting in the parking lot. When I arrived everyone denied any involvement, but it appeared two of the main actors in the early incident had decided it wasn't over. I spoke calmly and rationally to both, explained the consequences, and begged them to give each other a wide birth the rest of the night. As the two men, in a group of 15 others, moved inside I was pleased calmer heads had prevailed (until I got nearly inside). Without warning a brawl between the two men exploded inside the CNS. Several guest and a volunteer rushed in to pull them apart while I dialed 911. When TPD arrived both men acted remorseful. I did not want either sent to jail, but one had an outstanding warrant. The CNS quieted quickly and peace was finally restored.
I was ashamed I lost my temper that evening. I felt as though I had failed my mission. Charged with caring for people experiencing homelessness; instead going on a full blown tirade. I now realize I had been too lax in defining boundaries which caused the need for such an extreme. Compassion and love are often misperceived as weakness. God is a God of discipline and order. Defining boundaries for those we serve is an act of love and demonstrates we care. Once again I learned balance. This time a balance between lawlessness and draconian restrictions. Without boundaries people press outward to find them. When rules are used to manage people like cattle the spirit is crushed.
3. The Power of Restoration
The CNS afforded me the opportunity for the first time to live among the people I serve. From December through February I spent more time with them than my own family (yes I know, out of balance). I was humbled by their reaction to our simple efforts: a narrow cot less than 3 feet from the neighboring cots, a large shower room with no privacy, and day-old pastries. Tensions and strains I had observed for years began melting away and confidence began to emerge. God's presence was felt and restoration began. Connections moved from theory to reality. The homeless community is ripe for harvest. Efforts which would have little effect on those living in affluence have great impact on those living in the desert. It is time to move!
11 Two in a bed warm each other.
Alone, you shiver all night.
12 By yourself you're unprotected.
With a friend you can face the worst.
Can you round up a third?
A three-stranded rope isn't easily snapped. (Ecclesiastes 4:11-12, The Message)
11 My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD,
Nor detest His correction;
12 For whom the LORD loves He corrects,
Just as a father the son in whom he delights.
(Proverbs 3:11-12, New King James Version)
28 Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28, New King James Version)
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