The Still Small Voice

Where is the God of the Old Testament? Why do we not see his hand move as it once did? We are His hands and we are not moving. We have become too dull and distracted to hear his commands. God has not abandoned us, we have stopped listening.


My schedule is as busy as yours. The numbers and needs of those I serve are increasing but the financial and human resources are not. The Big Bend Homeless Coalition like many organizations is attempting to do more with less. Busyness threatens to consume my days and leaves little room for unscheduled activity. However, God is encouraging me to become more sensitive to His will and direction.


I woke Wednesday feeling our momentum towards the launch of Connections had slowed. It had been a few weeks since we had heard anything about our prospective property and the trail was growing cold. It was more difficult to pray that morning; it would have been easier to throw myself into work and busyness, but I pushed myself to open my prayer journal. I told God about my worries and fears and He repeated His common theme for this season, "Trust me, place your confidence in me." I laid my worries and fears down and asked God to help me become more sensitive to His will. The day unfolded in an unexpected way.


Deniz has a new office and she was allowed to order a new desk. When the desk arrived it was in pieces and she was expected to put it together. I was a bit slow to offer my help because I am so busy, but God had recently opened a few hours on Wednesday afternoons, so I volunteered for the job. However, as the time approached there was still a long list of folks wanting to see me. Reasons not to make the trip across town mounted: Deniz had a afternoon meeting, it would take me a half hour to get there, construction would take too long, it would be easier to do on Saturday, and I have lots of work to do. God said, "Go".


I went, not in the greatest of moods, but I went. I had to apologize to a few folks my walk-ins were over and ask them to return tomorrow or meet me across town in a few hours. One woman threw up her hands in disgust and walked out. As I approached Deniz's office my spirit began to lift and I found peace. My bride of twenty-one years gushed with excitement. She escorted me around the office and showed me off. It was completely unexpected, but really amazing. Deniz's eyes sparkled with joy and I felt her love and adoration. It was worth the trip, and a sign I was in God's will.


We ate lunch quickly and began assembling the main part of the desk. As 2:30 approached we knew we were not going to complete the entire desk. Deniz was pleased at what we had accomplished and gave me an opportunity to leave. I chose to stay. The second piece was a smaller version of the first. I decided I could easily assemble it and still make my afternoon appointment. With a mischievous smile Deniz produced a third smaller box labelled drawer, "this goes with it too!" My schedule was being challenged, but my heart wanted to finish the desk.


Deniz left for her meeting and I was left on my own. I marveled at how quiet and professional Deniz's office was compared to mine. It reminded me of visiting my Dad's office as a kid, I was hanging with the grown-ups. I finished the second piece of the desk on schedule and it was nearing time to leave. A quick trip to the restroom to clean up and I could be back across town with a few minutes to spare. God said, "stay".


I stayed, against my own sense of timing and schedule, I chose to obey. I returned from the restroom and began working on the drawer. The construction of the drawer was more complicated than the two larger pieces and required more time than either. Deniz's meeting finished as I was nearing completion. I looked up to see a woman standing in the doorway. She introduced herself as Susan (Deniz's boss). She thanked me for putting the desk together, told me how much she appreciated Deniz, and how excited she was about Connections. We shared our concerns for the impoverished and I learned about her work as a Parish Nurse on the weekends. It was a brief but enjoyable conversation.


Deniz returned as I was putting the final touches on the drawer. She was thrilled I had finished it. I gathered my tools and she escorted me downstairs. I met Ralph, a member of Deniz's bible study in the lobby and headed for my 4:00 appointment. I called ahead to let them know I would be a few minutes late, it turned out they were running behind too.


Deniz called me very excited around 7:30. I was heading home down a country road where cell phone coverage is very spotty. She said Susan told her she knew of someone new to the Department of Health who came from the Department of Juvenile Justice (the Department which owns our building). It was hard for me to hear, Deniz said something about a secretary. I thought, "Great! It is often the secretaries and administrative assistance who know how to get things done".


After dinner, Deniz sat down at the computer to draft an email to our new contact. She was wondering how formal the tone of the email should be. I was puzzled. She then explained our new contact was not a former secretary at DJJ but a Deputy Secretary, one person away from the Governor. Glory to God, a new door opened.


How many days have I missed God's voice; his subtle, seemingly meaningless directions. How many times have I missed opportunity because of my busyness. Wednesday, God illustrated the importance of being sensitive to his will. I misunderstood his desire to bless my marriage and create a new opportunity for Connections as a simple trip across town to build a desk. When I surrendered my schedule and chose to obey His subtle commands he accomplished the unimaginable.


Thursday morning I rummaged through my drawer to find one of my last business cards. As I turned it over to make a note for a client there were three Psalms listed on the back. Psalm 37 was one of them. I didn't take much notice and scribbled the note below, hoping the Psalms might have meaning for the client. Friday morning as I opened my prayer journal a piece of paper dropped to the desk. I opened it and found Psalm 37 printed upon it. Through His word, God repeated His common theme for this season.

Psalm 37:5-8 (New International Version)

5 Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:

6 He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when men succeed in their ways,
when they carry out their wicked schemes.

8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
do not fret—it leads only to evil.

  
¹¹ Then He said, “Go out, and stand on the mountain before the LORD.” And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; ¹² and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice.  
¹³ So it was, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood in the entrance of the cave. Suddenly a voice came to him, and said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”  
(1 Kings 19:11-13, New King James Version)